My thoughts on LOST

The best word to describe my feelings after watching the LOST finale is ... wait for it ... satisfied. I have to admit I'm glad it's over but it was truly an incredible journey that successfully distracted me from reality and completely grasped my full attention both during the show as well as times after the show where I tried to sift through the ambiguity of it all for something concrete I could grab on to. For me, LOST did what every good story does and that's allow me to get absorbed in a different reality and rejuvenate a little, not focusing on the worries and problems that my own always seems to be so full of. Say what you will but the writers put me on the island and gave me a relationship with the characters, without all the sand in my pants and between my toes - I absolutely hate that by the way!

So with all that being said ... it's over. It's finally over and I'm so very glad it is. I still have questions but unfortunately there will never be answers to them and I'm ok with that. A lady said to me yesterday that she hated the ending and feels like she's wasted 6 years of her life, to which I respond, most certainly not madam! While you may not be satisfied with the way things turned out you can't sit here and tell me you didn't enjoy being lost! Sure it was emotionally draining at times, frustrating even, but still enjoyable and ... just plain fun! So the way this is going to go is I'm going to give my thoughts on the epic ending and then ask some questions that probably don't have answers. Ready ... ?

So the whole flash sideways thing just worked for some reason. I feel like it fit the rest of the show and paralleled the previous shows structure perfectly. Now with that being said I don't know why Desmond's job was to open everyone's eyes but he always seemed to be the sort of wise old hermit character so I guess it worked. Plus who doesn't like to see Ben get his ass handed to him. I get the whole reality created by the souls / spirits / memories of the survivors of the plane crash thing they were going for and how it wasn't necessarily reality but was real nonetheless. But if that's the case why was it different for some then rather if the plane had just landed normally rather than crashed on the island? Like why was Sawyer a cop now but Kate was still a felon? I did love how they later connected everyone before Desmond and Hugo ended up forcing everyone together. But I have to say I did like the reference to the previous love-quadrangle making Jack and Juliette ex's and putting Jack and Kate semi-together in the end, it needed to happen let's be honest. But poor David Shepard, he didn't really exist and he didn't even know it. I don't think they did well on developing his and Jack's relationship, it seemed like one day they were distant and awkward around each other and then the next episode they were inseparable. But all that doesn't take away from the final moments which were clutch! I mean man's best friend, laying down next to dying-Jack, then eye closing which perfectly wraps up the beginning eye opening scene...got em! I applaud that. And what would lost be without being mystic but I do think they made it a point not to step on any toes with the whole religious-esk ending. I mean if you're going spiritual then you have to realize when a group of people have different religions with conflicting ideas, then everyone can't win and someone has to be wrong. So maybe the statement was it doesn't really matter and if you're a good person then you'll get to the light...I don't know. But all-in-all after I sat and thought about it and read some other people's interpretations, I'll give all parties involved in LOST's creation an attaboy and a good-game.

So at the end I was satisfied. I didn't want them to explain it all because the name of the show still was LOST, I don't expect to be completely filled-in and I honestly don't want to. I don't want to know why Desmond could withstand electromagnetism and what the light actually was. I don't want to know why Jacob had magical powers or who built the temple, but there are things I think they could have answered. But that's up next. Final words I liked it and think think it was a very appropriate ending. Not wonderful or awe-inspiring, just appropriate.

Now to the unanswered questions...
Gimme something more with the numbers! I mean they were EVERYWHERE and were such an integral part just to kind of ignore them at the end. I mean they were completely dropped after Jack flipped his shit and smashed the mirrors. Someone ask freaking Jacob why he chose those dadgum numbers please!!!

Why polar bears Dharma? It's a tropical island. Even if your doing a test at least get a more regular bear!

Why could the island and sometimes it's inhabitants time travel? I think that part could have been completely left out and was just a way to further separate Jin and Sun. They never really dealt with it and I don't feel like when smokey and his boys installed the handy wheel in the side of the wall, it was intended for time travel.

Why can't everyone just be with their kids? I mean Jin never got to meet his freaking daughter for crying out loud!

Was the black smoke really Jacob's brother or was it just some evil on the island that could look like whoever had died? And since Jacob had killed his brother, which he shouldn't have been allowed to do anyways right?, was he just inhabiting his brother's body. And if they could hurt each other why didn't he just throw Jacob into a tree periodically if he was so pissed. I kind of feel like he got the short end of the stick there being murdered by his brother and betrayed by his mom and everything.

That's all I got for now. I'm sure I'll have some more questions and I'll be sure to write them here when I come up with them.

The life and times of David Awalt the Great

So it's graduation season ... yep ... it's been almost exactly a year since I accepted Dan Reneau's congrats along with that much coveted diploma. So naturally I've been reflecting on my life since that fateful day and I feel like this past year has been slightly nuts.
I mean a lot has happened in my life since the beginning of last summer, which was slow and boring enough to make me think the year would follow suit. Then the restlessness set in and it felt like I just couldn't sit still anymore, so I ran away.
I ended up making my way to Austin, which is when things seemed to really hit the proverbial fan. Even though I had run away from it all, everything just seemed to catch right back up to me. Through a lot of hurt and frustration, some of which still exists today, some friendships were truly tested and the ones that had ever been worth anything withstood the trials. Others just faded into the drama and chaos surrounding my life. Friendships I had thought were solid enough turned out to not be what I thought, which actually turned out to be an eye-opener about the time and effort I had put into things so temporary. This opening led to a spectrum of emotions that I am still going through.
But Austin itself also gave me a little insight into what the real world was actually like outside the little bubble that is college and even the little town of Ruston. I loved my time there and don't regret anything about it because at the end of the day I can say I tried, and while it might not seem like much ... it really is something.
And everyday I feel like I'm learning more about people's priorities in the workplace and in everyday life. As I struggle to make end's meat over a job that I'm not that fond of, I can't help but feel bitter and taken advantage of. I am forced to focus on things I've never wanted to worry about, like not having health insurance and making sure I have enough saved to pay back my monthly student loan payments.
So here's my advice ... the real world is tough and don't underestimate it. But it's a necessary step for everyone to take, when they're ready. just be prepared to learn a lot about yourself and what's important to you. So to all my friends who've stuck with me and value what we have above the things that could have gotten in the way, I owe you all a high-five and a good-game. To the others ... have fun growing up.
With all of that being said I have no regrets and I'm still excited to see how this turns out. Life's an adventure and I'm just getting started. So I'll face the second star to the right and do my best to fly straight on till morning.

Broadcasting...sheesh

So if you would have told me when I was 7 that I would have no clue what I wanted to do when I "grew up" I would have literally scoffed at you...that's right...a full-fledged scoff. Well scoff away past-David because I have no clue what I want to do, but I'm pretty sure it has nothing to do with broadcasting.
Early, early mornings on weekends put me in bed around 8 starting Wednesday night, which does wonders for my social life. Now I realize the concept of working your way up in the industry but this job is just a transitional, get-experience-under-your-belt type of job rather than a pursuit of a career. So where's the point that it becomes worth it to just say, "ef it!" I'd rather be miserable at work and have my nights and weekends free to pursue my social life than be miserable at work and not have my nights and weekends free to pursue my social life?
So as of 5:18am on Thursday, May 6, 2010...my plan is to (drumrole...drumrole)...I have no idea!
Gotcha!
But really I think if I'm still doing this stupid shift in 6 months, am addicted to over-the-counter pain-reliever pills with a PM attached to the end and am in serious need of a new kidney but still don't have health insurance ... I think I'll become a teacher. Hey good benefits and summers off right?!?
At the risk of sounding like I'm complaining too much I'll say that I do like being on the up-and-up of what's going on in the world and in the Arklatex...that last one was kind of a joke...and I do like dreaming about being part of the face-change of local news.
But the hours are bad and the pay is low, two major major cons against this lovely industry, but every once in a while something will happen that makes it all seem worth it.
the other day we had a meeting for work in which we discussed revolutionizing the news industry and my mind started racing. I got legitimately excited about the things I could do to change the industry but then got a crash of reality as I realized that my position as a weekend morning producer wouldn't allow me to creatively produce the content that I dream of producing. I really do think I would like this job if it didn't start at 3 in the morning on weekends and completely ruin any chance I had of spending some quality time with my buddies and lovely girl friend, but I am filling a need so I guess the lesson here is suck it up and take it like a man David.
So during my time writing this I have come to the conclusion that I'll do this as long as I can take it and if I really start to see my life and general mood suffer then I'll make sure my priorities are right. If everything seems to be in line but I still hate everything...then maybe it'll be time for a change. But for now let's just take things as they come and maybe I can figure out a way to sleep and have a social life, not one or the other.
In close if I ever saw my 7-year-old self scoffing at me I would politely punch him in the face and tell myself to get ready to face reality cause it's truly a bitch.

The Green Machine

So in an effort to become more environmentally conscious I've decided to start riding my bike to work. A 3 mile ride in the cool morning air ought to do me some good right?...right? Well what I planned on being a nice and easy ride to work turned out to not be so nice and easy. While the morning air is relatively cool, I still worked up a pretty good sweat while I was huffing and puffing my way down the back streets. What is usually a 5 minute drive has become a 15 minute bike ride, which actually does seem to make a difference in my sleep schedule. It also puts a huge hindrance on my lunch break, not really allowing for 30 extra minutes to ride home and back, I either have to pack my lunch in the mornings or else eat somewhere around where I work, an option I realized today I can't really afford. So there are some main disadvantages to hoping on the trusty steed and pedaling my out of shape self to the news station, but there are definitely some good points. For one thing I guess I'm saving money. While it's true that my car doesn't use that much gas in the 3 miles to work, it still feels like I'm joining the fight to make a difference. And I also get in some much-needed cardio before and after I sit at a desk all day. So that's my start to bettering our planet.

Oh the way things turn out

So we'll skip all the it's been so long, and I've been so busy lately stuff and just say hello.
As I jump into this game of trying to impress people at my new job with fresh ideas and a drive to succeed I've begun thinking is this industry really worth all that I'll need to put into it. Yea it's a job which, trust me, I am thankful for, but is it worth the stress and the emotional pain and frustration that it's probably going to bring. I say this having just finished my first week up here and people apparently love it here. But they all seem to have this passion and drive for the news, something which I lack. I would love to change it in a way that makes it more appealing and web-based rather than just depressing stories watched on a less-than-clear broadcast. But this job guarantees good experience and a day that promises to never be the same from day-to-day. Well the work will be the same but the topics and issues won't be. I'll hopefully get the chance to write and already have a little bit, but right now it's just tuning out radio scanners the noise of the newsroom. I've still got my dreams but those are on hold right now as I try to get some experience under my belt so one day I might can pursue those dreams. So for now I'll deal with the undetermined schedule and potentially horrible hours and pretend that my dream is to be an investigative reporter. I'll build some furniture, my new hobby, and move out of my parents' house in a month. So wish me luck...

Hey look over there!

I think like everyone else in the entire world it is easy to let distractions distract ones self from the task at hand and consume one's time and thoughts, hence the definition being: a thing that prevents one from giving full attention to something else. But in my state of job-hunting and slowly watching my meager bank account deplete even more, these distractions are almost a bliss to me, my own escape into something undaunting and just plain unimportant. Especially in a time where every decision seems life or death, every action must be judged, and every minute is priceless, it is my glimpse of heaven when I let my mind wander and escape into something so consuming. A good, thorough distraction is sometimes hard to come by though. These days its starting to become harder and harder to completely loose sight of the thought of potential failure that seems to have its jaws locked around the hem of my slacks. It used to be easier to ignore because it started as a small dog, something of the toy variety and has since grown into something like a terrier. I can feel it starting to achieve pit bullish status and I can honestly say I am a little bit afraid. But I guess putting your hope into something so fleeting and flimsy is never a good idea. So focus is going to be my key word today, this week, this month, and this year. Focus on the task at hand, not a distraction. And when I feel these distractions coming on I'll just show them the ferocious rottweiler that will soon be growling at my ankles and it'll turn tail and run.

Oh no it's the cops!

“Oh no it’s the cops”

There was something there that shouldn’t have been. Through the bordering-on-ridiculously loud chords and notes ripped apart by distortion, the clash of wood on thin metal cymbals and various other too-loud sounds produced by the drum set, and the gentle “puuvvhhfff” of the base something was cutting through that didn’t fit. It was a chore getting the band to quit playing, complete silence was avoided as much as possible for some inexplicable reason, but once the “music” stopped the oddity rang loud and clear.
It sounded a lot like an angry goose. “What is that?” I asked as I walked towards the window. Before I could finagle myself to the window between the amplifiers, cords, and cases to look outside and find the answer to my question, the cyclical flash of blue and red filled the curtains. “Guys it’s the freaking police.” I said disappointedly as my heart began to race. To understand my reaction, you must understand that I was probably the most timid kid that ever lived. I avoided trouble as much as possible by being as good and well mannered as I could. This has gotten better through out the years but I still hadn’t had an encounter like this with the strong arm of the law before.
Of course I was elected to go outside…I mean why wouldn’t I be elected, I was the only one not holding anything so it’s perfectly natural that I charge bravely into the unknown? As my heart tried unsuccessfully to leap out of my chest, I slowly opened the door and fearlessly, and by fearlessly I mean not fearlessly at all , stepped into the cool night air. I was immediately blinded by the 10 billion watt power of a Q-beam, and was forced to shield my eyes before they melted. As I tried to avoid the gigantic glowing green monster consuming my vision I desperately followed the voice of the officer and stumbled over to the car. You’re probably wondering why he was still shining his freaking light in my eyes, I was wondering the same thing?
“Come here boy.” He said, country just dripping off his tongue. “Yes sir.” I said politely, my strategy was this…be polite and he’ll go away with out shooting me. “I’ve been out here for 20 minutes honking my horn waiting for y’all to come out. I’ve had neighbors calling in for hours complaining about all the racket y’all are making, and if I have to come out here again I’m going to arrest all of y’all and take y’all down to the station. Understand?” First let’s address the problems with his story…
For starters we had just started the song literally a minute before we stopped so there is no way he was there for 20 minutes, second if he was there I think an exposed, angry-goose horn is louder and more annoying than music muted by thick wooden walls of the cabin we practiced in. And third, why didn’t he lug his lumbering mass out of his car and knock on the door? I mean…who just sits outside and honks for 20 minutes straight? Lastly…how was he going to arrest all 6 of us and take us to the station in one car? He’d have to make at least two trips, and like we would really just sit there waiting for him to come back.
During this get-to-know-you-time I’d had with the Officer of the law, two of my brave and courageous band mates, and by brave a courageous I mean not brave and courageous , opened the door timidly and shuffled over to the car. At this point I would love to go on to tell you I lost my temper and told the cop he was full of it if he thought I believed his crap about sitting outside for 20 minutes and to step out of the car and just try to arrest us. But alas I didn’t do that. I also didn’t attack his behemoth form when he lumbered out of the car, disarm him after giving him a nasty rap on the chin, steal his car and get the heck out of dodge. I haven’t been on the run from the law living the mysterious and sexy life of a fugitive for the past 4 years, and I haven’t had to lie, cheat and steal to survive. I didn’t do any of those things for three reasons, which I will promptly list for you…
Reason number 1, He never got out of his car. Since the incident I have convinced myself that he would have if the effort of pulling and forcing his obese form out of the seat would have left him exhausted and therefore utterly defenseless from any attack I might throw his way and he didn’t want to risk it.
Reason number 2, I had not yet seen any of the Prison Break seasons so I didn’t have as good of a grasp on how to survive as a fugitive from the law and break out of jail if the need arose.
Reason number 3, I am terrified of police and getting into trouble and therefore would have been shaking too bad to do anything but comply to his every command had he actually gotten out of the car to arrest us.
So while none of the exciting, movie-like action was happening we listened a little more to him power-tripping on us. Then he drove away and we slunk back to the cabin. “I hate you all.” I said as I grabbed my cell phone and walked back outside to the car while everyone packed up their equipment. The Man had shut us down and you never know…had we gotten a chance to finish practicing that night we might have just written the greatest song of our generation, it’s doubtful but if I utterly fail in life and have no one else to blame but myself I’ll always have that cop for shutting a big jail-cell door on my future. We continued to practice out there and never one got the cops called on us, until the owners decided they didn’t want us using it anymore. So we had to get all our stuff out, clean the place, break one window, fix it and say goodbye to our muse. I can’t blame the pigs for that one, and that’s a whole nother story, but I will say thanks for not arresting me, you never know how that might have gone down.